Nerissa is a member of the Diary of a Single Mom bloggers network. Real women. Real Mothers. Real Life.
The late 90s and into the 21st Century seemed to be all about showing gratitude. All the talk shows and authors were promoting this wonderful idea that we should be more thankful and less sorrowful about the shouldas, wouldas, and couldas.
It seemed no more than a nice thing to practice then, but now I know it as the best way to live. A friend called me recently needing my opinion on depression and how to deal with it. After a few moments of thought, I told her she needed to be more thankful. Depression can’t live in a thankful heart or spirit, I said with confidence. I knew it to be true as I remember fighting my way out of depression, not with drugs but with prayer and thanksgiving.
It is not the easiest thing to do when your cupboards are empty and your marriage is failing, but get thankful. You may have been out of a job for more years than you’ve had one, and the bills don’t even come anymore in your name because you don’t own anything or live anywhere, but get thankful.
Nerissa, if I could come up with one thing to be thankful for I would but I can’t think of any. Nothing good is happening to me and it sucks to be me right now. Girl, get thankful. Be thankful that you have a sound mind, be thankful that you found a moment to read this column, be thankful that you can breathe.
Don’t try to rationalize it or measure whether it is wrong or right just be thankful. When the bills do show up, still say a big thank you. I do, because I can remember when I had to depend on others to shelter, feed, and clothe me and my kids. I am thankful because I have a job even when it is challenging and frustrating. I am thankful even when at the end of the day, I’m just exhausted, needing to write but not having the energy to do it. I am thankful for my children even on those days when I ask myself “What did I get myself into?” Is it too late to give them back?
Life brings us many opportunities to just be down and frustrated, but every one of those moments are also a chance to overcome them through thanksgiving. I pray for you that you will have a thankful heart, especially on the days when there seems to be no valid reason to say thank you, say it anyway.
Nerissa Golden is the mother of four amazing children and lives on the island of Montserrat. She is the author of Truly Caribbean Woman’s Guide to Good Love and The Making of a Caribbeanpreneur: Strategies for Overcoming Fear and Building Wealth. Find more of her writings at www.trulycaribbean.net.