I’ve been praying and searching to see if anyone has written anything about this. It was the words spoken to me by a man, I did not recognize who showed up in a vision one year ago. He asked me what year it was and at the time I was working on a piece called “The Year of the Giver” and he said “No, It’s the Year of a Thousand Tears.”
Since then I have watched as tragedy after tragedy unfolded and in 2009, many of them had to do with airlines. By the end of 2009, I wanted it to be that it was the end of the tears but as I write, tears a falling by the thousands in Haiti and around the world as people struggle for life, for answers, for hope.
As usual, I don’t write when I know all the answers but hoping that as I process my thoughts unto paper, answers would be revealed.
I don’t have many tears these days and I am not distressed by it. Seems like I spent so many years crying that it is a relief not to break down at every rough spot. That is not to say I don’t feel like crying at times but somehow God sends someone to stop them before they even spill out. My tears in the past few months haven’t been of sadness but of immense joy and I haven’t given way to them as I would have if they were for feelings of despair.
2007 to 2009 was a year of separation and preparation for me and many others. It seemed during that period a host of men and women were broken in their spirit and forced to their knees desiring one thing, to know Him in the power of His resurrection. Many of us like the part about resurrection, cause it speaks to life beginning again, second chances, power and authority. Not a lot of us want anything to do with the other part of that verse which says “and in the fellowship of His suffering.” Who wants to find fellowship in suffering like Jesus did?
Certainly not me but when I remember what it was that Jesus did on my behalf and the world, then I don’t want to desire anything but to be with Him and like Him as close as I possibly can. Its all fancy words that you hear people testify about it in church but its so hard to make the decision. I have had to repent more than once about speaking those fancy words without the “cajones” to back them up. I continue to learn to shut my mouth and let the spirit direct even what I should be ambitious enough to desire.
We won’t all suffer painful deaths or tragedy. Some of us will suffer from isolation because we choose the roads less traveled and dare to dream and do stuff others don’t have the courage to. Some will cry tears of joy when they hold a newborn baby, others at the loss of a loved one. Some will cry when their marriage ends, others that elusive love and commitment have finally found them. Some will mourn and cry for too many regrets and pain caused that they can never take back, others will cry because they didn’t have the courage to stand up for themselves.
A burden is lifting right now, for as usual the answer to that line of the vision is clear. As long as we live, there will be reasons for tears. We each will shed a thousand tears or more this year, not all for ourselves, not all for sad or tragic reasons. My prayer for you is that they are honest tears and once shed, someone will be there to help you dry your eyes and move forward with joy.
That I may know him, and the power of his resurrection, and the fellowship of his sufferings, being made conformable unto his death;
And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away.